Ditch the quick fix

Ditch the quick fix.

We live in a day and age where everything is scarily accessible, we want everything to be fixed there and then. Whether it being the morning coffee fix that you have now become reliant on to wake you up or now having the choice to take slimming pills instead of natural weight loss is mind boggling and bizarre.

I wanted to use the example of paracetamol to start things off. This particular pain relief enables you to postpone a pain in the stomach or maybe a headache for a short while but  by making the choice of going straight in for the paracetamol in the meds cupboard you are failing to see what it is that occurred these aches and pains in the first place. We need to be questioning what the root cause may be instead of masking the problem. You may need to cut a particular food out of your diet to get rid of the stomach ache or you may need to lessen your screen time to avoid that irritating headache that keeps unwelcomely coming back. 

I think for many of us we spend a lot of our precious time avoiding unwanted feelings or situations and trying to mask it with a quick fix - something that’s in our human nature nowadays. We create protective bubbles for ourself and fill it with particular activities, routines, legal and possible illegal substances. Things such as drugs, alcohol, over-sleeping, over-working and over-eating are just a few of the go-to options that can hold things together for only a short period of time. The problem with a quick fix of anything is that it is only ever temporary and will never address the underlying problem you may be facing. Until you are ready to ditch the quick fixes and stand and face the problem head on, it will keep coming back around like a boomerang and increasingly get harder every time.

I think when it comes down to trying to take short cuts to steer clear of complication; You are eventually one day going to have to turn it around and start thinking long term. Changing your mind-set to think long term allows you to realise that you are never trapped in your present circumstances no matter how difficult it may seem at the time (especially in these weird and crazy times we are living in now). In these present circumstances when everything feels so far out of your reach, all you want to do is reach for a LARGE glass of alcohol or go to sleep until the problems goes away but then BOOM. There they are again ready and waiting to eat you alive if you let it. Yes sleeping may postpone the issue until you wake up and yes alcohol may have made you forget about it for those few hours but now what?

When thinking about the past, some may find it very difficult to think long term as they are exhaustedly dragging around problems from their past and bringing it into their day to day life having a knock on effect on their mood and behaviour including myself. I felt as though I was constantly on the run all the time from constant bad memories instead of taking the time to sit down 1-1 with myself and resolve them. The past is not something that can be changed and is one hundred percent out of our control and power. What we do have is the power of self development and that every day is a fresh start. It is most important to remember that you are not and never will be a representation of your past and that your past does not define you in any way.

I found it incredibly difficult to be able to actually sit with situations / feelings / my past that I had been so desperately been trying to avoid at all costs. Sometimes it’s about taking the very first initial step of acceptance which sets you on the road to becoming your best self and everybody deserves to be their best self don’t they. These steps may consist of finally admitting to yourself that it’s time to seek help with your feelings or it may be making that first phone call apologising to a loved one. A new habit takes at least 21 days of consistent effort to set in and I do believe that once you sit (and yes it will be uncomfortable) and make peace with whatever is stopping you living your life to the fullest, things will start to slowly change for you. You begin to slowly feel the weight lift off your shoulders and wish you had done it sooner. Its all about challenging those dark and gloomy rain clouds that have been hovering over your head and acknowledging the fact they will pass on eventually because you are always bigger than what makes you anxious. It’s about taking time for self-care to accept things for the way they are which takes a lot of hard work and commitment as self-care isn’t all about the face masks and bubble baths, self-care is about taking time for yourself until you are yourself again.